The pleasure is all mine [...yours?]

I have a big mirror in my room and I begged my partner for months to get one for his apartment. My deal with full-body mirrors? It's actually a deal with my body!

When I stand naked in front of a mirror what do I see? Well, first I see how perfectly my facial features complement each other. I then divert my eyes to my lovely clavicles, saggy boobs, and wide smiley belly. From there my long, coarse and awkwardly distributed pubic hair comes into full view, followed by my audacious hips, and thighs. I see my hyper-pigmented knees and inner thighs, my cellulite and stretch marks don't shy away either. I see, appreciate, and drink in all of these individually, something I absolutely love to do.

Why did I just take you on a body trip? Today we're all about sexual pleasure - sex for one -

and that is a full-body experience so all insecurities need to be locked away in a dark room somewhere because when it's time for sexual pleasure, they have no business lingering in your mind.

How exactly should a vulva owner masturbate?

There are plenty of tips online, you can start by checking out A Beginner's Guide to Masturbation or 15 Female Masturbation Tips That Will Take You Over the Edge, but one that comes from me is: make it a full-body experience. Before I gained confidence, curiosity, and some experience in the bedroom, I used to just pounce for the genital area and inadequately touch myself without lube. As you can imagine, there's not much of a story there.

The game changed when I absent-mindedly caressed myself while studying one day and I was pleased with my body's response to my touch. I put my books away, grabbed some lube, and went on to give my body what it was begging for.

To adequately stimulate your whole body for a mind-blowing experience, neglect your vulva for a couple of minutes and focus on awakening the other body's sensations. Light, subtle feather-like touch is a great way to start off - a beautiful tease that will get you nice and warmed up. Trace along your jawline to your ear, down your neck to your chest (if you have sensitive and responsive nipples, linger there for a few seconds), and work your way down to your inner thighs. Have a look at 31 Hottest Erogenous Zones for more ideas on where to touch. As you get warmed up, get creative with your touch and increase the pressure.

Play with temperature. Grab some ice and leave cold wet trails, making sure you don't miss the opportunity to use your fingers to caress while rubbing the ice on your skin. Perhaps try using frozen fruits and lick the sweet stickiness off your fingers, rub the fruits on your nipples and suck them hard.

Is your clit starting to throb? Ignore it, it's not time for it yet! Refer back to the erectile circuitry, touch and stimulate everything but the clit. Tips on how to do this were sent to subscribers at the time so if you'd like to receive them, subscribe with your email address below.

Just a quick word on the 'G-spot'. I mentioned that there is no particular or special tissue you should expect to find and that it is just a part of the complex clitoral network. Many people have started referring to it as an area rather than a spot, in the sensitive lower third of the vagina anteriorly, i.e., the roughened part that forms the ceiling of your vagina, facing towards your belly button. If you cannot elicit a response from this area, that's perfectly fine because there's still more to touch and enjoy.

Only get to your clit when you've adequately stimulated all that you can. Ride a pillow or cushion while you grab your boobs and ass, and throw in a little choke. Honestly, just free your mind and go with whatever flows, it'll totally be worth the fuss.

Much of sex takes place in the mind so the trick to really experiencing pleasure is to stay in the moment and let go of all your worries. If you have insecurities about your body, try to forget them. You are, after all, alone in your own space and there's no partner to be worried about - no one to make you feel like "you're taking too long" to get turned on or orgasm. It's just you! Take full advantage of this and remember, the sexier you feel, the better the experience.

If you still can't escape your mind, run yourself a warm bath (preferably, bubbly), light some candles, pour yourself a glass of wine, and put on a lovely playlist. Just the idea of getting nasty while bathing is erotic on its own. Yummmm!!!

Do you always have to orgasm when you have sex (solo or with a partner)?

Absolutely not, and thinking about whether you're going to orgasm during sex can actually hinder the process. Orgasmless sex is not bad sex. Sex is a whole experience that should be enjoyed and the point is for you to feel good.

There's no right or wrong way to experience pleasure, there's no definite list of things to do that'll work for everyone. We are all unique and each woman should experience her own pleasure by doing what feels good to her. I will talk more about orgasms in a subsequent post so keep an eye out for that.

That's it for today, lovely people. Thank you once again for joining me. I hope you're feeling hot and bothered down there, and ready to own your pleasure. I kept the post short and sweet but please do click on the links I have provided for additional information. Be the first to know when I have published a new post and learn more with me by subscribing below. Enjoy the rest of your weekend, I hope to pique your interest again next week. Stay safe and spread the love on your socials.